THE ADMIN & THE DUDE ON A POWER TRIP

Seriously - if you have an admin with a nasty ass attitude (oh, I don't know, the kind who complains about having to answer the phone and says she "can't believe this shit" and that "she'll never get anything done" if she has to "keep answering the phone" ... for instance) and everybody knows it - why keep her?

I don't get it - but anyway, she's here. And I get an email that someone assigned me a project that I haven't completed and I look at the task menu to see that I don't actually have one. Hmmmm.

So, I figure it all out that I wasn't listed as an employee yet in the system when the assignment was made and it actually was tasked to someone else. THE ADMIN.

So, I ask her about it and she says that she gave it to my boss since I wasn't here that day. Ok, so I then figure out that it was an email from a few weeks ago that I didn't understand ... from my boss telling me that he got it from [insert admin's name here] and I remember at the time having no idea who [insert admin's name here] was.

Anyway, so THE ADMIN proceeds to tell me that I have to get into the database to do it. Except, I'm new and don't know shit about the database. And she says that I should ask [insert another person's name here] to show me how, because she doesn't have the time.

She then proceeds to explain to me that her name is still attached to this project and she will go into the database to remove her name. Ok, bitch - so you can go into the database to remove your name from the fucking list, but you can't show me what the fuck needs to be done? I get it.

Then I go said third party and get a stand up lesson. That is - she drove the mouse and I watched as she showed me what to do in the database. Whatever, I'll adjust.

Except when I go to my desk to complete this task ... I don't have write permission in the database so I can't change anyting. So, I ask if I have write permissions. I don't. I'm told that DUDE ON A POWER TRIP (DOAPT) will give me the permissions and I can do the work.

It's been an hour - and nothing. I call DOAPT and ask about it. He says he hasn't gotten to it yet. I say "OK" and don't hang up the phone. He explains that maybe ... and get THIS shit ... I should ask THE ADMIN to do it for me.

"Yeah - that's not gonna work"

"not gonna work"

"right"

"She told you to do it yourself?"

"right"

I hold the phone and he says he will get it done, since I have now 30 minutes til I leave.

Nothing. No call, no show.

DOAPT is the same mfer who won't order me a laptop, even though my director and the president himself are in agreement that I should have one ... and I've asked twice ... and his excuse is that he has to order a couple of them and he wants to get all the info together.

Right, because you ALWAYS get discounts on laptops when you order them in quantities of TWO!!!

I am two inches away from whipping out my degree in ethnicology and tellin' these damn mfkin people to get up off they white pedastals and GET ME MY SHIZNIT!!!!!

TWO INCHES AWAY!!!!!!!!!